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This Is What Justice Looks Like

I’m a survivor, not a victim

By: sara w.

I was 16 when a guy took advatange of me. I was on meds for anxiety and he kept telling me I forgot to take them. I passed out and when I woke up the next morning he said it would have been more fun if I had been awake. I asked what he meant but he didn’t say anything and just left. It took me a moment to realize he had sex with me while i was asleep. A few years later, he got married and had a daughter, and thought about what he had done to me and sent me an email asking for forgiveness as well as a check for ten thousand dollars for what he had done because he felt guilty now that he had a daughter. I asked him if he would have felt the same if he had a son, and he said likely not. I followed up with an email that said he could keep his guilt and his money, because I wasn’t a prostitute than and i’m not one now. That was the day I truly felt like a survivor because now he knows what its like to carry around the shame of what he had done.

This event also led to me figuring out who I was as a person and I realized I was only dating men to make my father happy and not myself. I ended up coming out as a lesbian shortly after and even though it cost me a few friends and family members, I’m finally happy being me.

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